Planning a wedding can be a lot of fun. But many of us are not used to organising such a big event, especially one that has so many elements and emotions. It can get pretty stressful and overwhelming very easily! Fortunately, there are many ways you can keep your stress levels down. Here are 5 of the most useful, put together by bridal coach Juliet M. Dujmovic from Let’s Get Your Life Together coaching.
1. Plan
Something that can be the most overwhelming is just how many elements there are to a wedding. When you think about them all at the same time, that knot in your stomach can form and it can seem way too big. The trick is to get them in an ordered list. This way, you can prioritise your tasks better.
At the beginning of your wedding planning period, brain dump all the elements to your wedding, and then rank them. Answer questions such as:
– Which one is most important?
– Which one is most urgent?
– How much time in advance do I need to have this task complete?
– Which one can wait until a little later?
Rank your tasks, and get them in an order. You can start to date them when you know your actual wedding date. Once you have them in line, you can act on them ONE AT A TIME. One task at a time is much less daunting!
2. Check what else is going on in your life
When you’re planning your wedding, life doesn’t stop in the background. Weddings tend to go hand in hand with other life events: moving homes, building a house, having a baby. For me, I was completing my university degree, so you could also be studying, or even working on a big career moment. To avoid doubling your stress, make sure no big wedding tasks or events (engagement parties, bachelorette/stag dos etc) are occurring around the same time as big life events. Spread out your tasks, and slot them in between the rest of your life. You’ll want to avoid having 3 months of nothing, then 4 big events happening within the same week! Answer questions such as those below to help guide your thought process here:
– What’s happening in your life during your wedding planning period?
– Write down the dates to any non-related wedding events are coming up. How much control do you have over their timing?
– How can you spread these events out to balance their regularity?
– If you aren’t able to spread them out, how could you manage the busy periods better? What could you do to help yourself here?
3. Regularly update the money situation
One of the biggest stress causes when planning your wedding is money. Weddings are not cheap, but money management isn’t always fun either. The trick here is to keep on top of it. When we don’t, the money management gets bigger and bigger, it gets too daunting to even look at, and then we lose control of our spending. But, what gets managed gets monitored, and when you’re on top of your money management, it actually can be fun. So, set aside some time, either weekly or monthly or every few months, to update all your wedding costs.
Set up a budget tracker from the get-go (Microsoft Excel is great for this, and also has a template ready to go. There’s plenty of wedding journals out there too if you’re a stationery lover like me!). Check the wedding plan you’ve created (from tip 1), keep your receipts, update your budget tracker, and update everyone who needs to be kept in the loop.
The scariest part of money management is when you just don’t know how much you’ve spent. The unknown is always scary. So, when you’re on top of it and know exactly how much you’re spending, you won’t be wasting time stressing about money. Hopefully, you’ll also avoid any surprise payments that were forgotten!
– How much are you and your partner/parents/etc wanting to spend on your wedding?
– How do you want to track all your wedding costs?
– When can you schedule in some time in your diary to sit down and update your money management tracker?
– Who do you need to keep up to date on the wedding costs as well?
4. Do a little shopping around
Another money stress reliever: when trying to stick to a budget, it really does pay to do your homework. One example from my own personal experience: We asked for flower quotes from 4 different florists. Of those 4 quotes, 2 were roughly the same, the third was super cheap and the fourth one was double the price! Had we not done our homework, we could’ve been paying for a very expensive florist. This can really hurt and add a lot of financial stress to your plate. It’s recommended to get at least 3 quotes for the suppliers you require.
But also, shop around for wedding ideas. There are many ways you can get creative for your wedding, have fun and stick well into your budget: reuse previous items, buy second-hand, online, borrow, DIY, hire. We actually used a branch from the backyard to make the cutest little name placements. There’s also a lot of items that aren’t actually classed as ‘bridal’ can still fit into your wedding theme, and will be cheaper than if they were a ‘bridal’ product. Not only will you feel proud of your thrifty skills, which will give you a self-esteem boost, but you’ll help reduce any financial stresses you’re experiencing. Don’t forget to utilise social media platforms and Pinterest for ideas as well!
– In what areas could you get thrifty and creative for your wedding?
– Where could you look for ideas?
– Who is particularly creative in your family or friends circle who would LOVE to help you out here (there’s always that someone!)?
5. Take care of yourself
Funnily enough, it’s when life gets busiest that we need to ensure we are taking care of ourselves the most. During your wedding planning period is one of these times. With appointments, meetings and deadlines to keep track of and action, you can start to feel like you need time to catch up with yourself. Your body may also tell you that it’s time to give yourself some attention; you might get colds more often than usual, lose/gain weight, or have break outs, just to name a few signs.
So, what can you do? Firstly, eat a little better and exercise a little more. Some brides want to lose weight anyway for their wedding, but eating healthier and exercising will also improve your mental health and help you manage stress better. Having someone to do this with can make it easier, and will help you keep yourself accountable. You might even like to join a yoga or meditation class. Or, have a walking buddy who can double up as a ranting buddy to release any wedding frustrations on.
Try and keep up the activities you were doing before you became engaged as well. Socialise and have fun with your friends and family, and most importantly, spend quality time with your partner. This is very important to ensure you remember what all this wedding hype is for.
Lastly, also have dates with yourself. Alone time can be very rejuvenating, just doing whatever it is you like to do alone. As the saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup, so try and take care of yourself regularly, doing something at least once a week, to keep refilling that cup. By the time your wedding day comes, you’ll be calm and refreshed and able to fully enjoy every moment!
– What do you absolutely love doing?
– What activities do you do to really relax and rejuvenate your energy levels?
– When can you have regular dates with your partner?
– When can you have regular dates with yourself?
Visit Let’s Get Your Life Together at The National Wedding Show, Olympia London at stand NT46 to find out more about their bridal coaching that provides guidance and regular coaching on planning your wedding, keeping organised, working through wedding dramas and most importantly, taking care of YOU.